Forget judging me mum’s, I’m asking for help

Photo by Dave Clubb on Unsplash

I will never understand why women, particularly mum’s, continue to tear each other down.

I had my first real experience with this last week.

It was my own fault, plagued with worry and exhausted from yet another night of little sleep I posted a question on an online mum’s forum.

You see my 14-month-old still wakes 2-3 times a night.

I asked for no judgement, but wondered if anyone else was in the same predicament.

Instead of support or even advice from other parents going through something similar. I received unsolicited and confusing advice from parents who say their kids have slept through since they were 2 months old.

Now, if that is actually true.

I bow down to those mum’s. And in reality I’m super jealous. But I find it hard to believe that their babies have slept through the night from 7pm to 7am for their entire lives.

What about teething? Developmental leaps? Or even a common cold?

I call bull-tish on all of it.

Worse than the white lies these mum’s tell each other is the constant negativity and judgement they push towards them.

I was accused of spoiling my daughter, of taking the easy way out and being plain lazy.

When in actual fact, I’m exhausted from constantly trying to do the very best for her.

It’s a common theme.

This is not only linked to sleep (although I have personally found this to be the worst). We constantly feel the need to judge each other. Whether it’s judging someone for their pregnancy ailments, how they give birth or whether they breast feed – everyone has an opinion.

Carrying, birthing and bringing up a child is hard enough.

I found the early months super isolating – always questioning myself and what I was doing. Desperate to be the best mum I could be.

So Instead of judging each other.

Why don’t we use the brains trust to share information and support.

It’s time to lift each other up, not push each other down.